what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
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