i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
