Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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