Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize