I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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