I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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