Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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