sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
