that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
