She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
