my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
