I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i believe in u and ur pee
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
