i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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