Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
