Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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