So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
