one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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