You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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