oh god the rape fog is back!
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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