So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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