? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
