perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
