You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
