sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Randomize
