Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
