Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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