its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
