I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
