there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize