ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
