Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize