I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
