Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
