She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize