At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
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