That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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