no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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