"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I need to align my fucking chakras
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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