Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
