As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize