Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
