Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize