just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
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