Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize