So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
