ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
