He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
