Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize