i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
