so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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