I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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